This Good Big Sister

Making baby food for Violet.

Penelope has been very much wanting to do everything for Violet. She wants to change her diapers, make her food, bathe her, choose her clothes, push her on the swings, hold her on the slide. Anything and everything that involves taking care of Violet is most important to her right now. It always means more work for me, because in order for Pen to help Vi, I have to help Pen help Vi. It is much quicker for me to just do it myself, but then somebody would not feel so useful, someone would not be able to be nurturing and caring to someone even smaller than herself. When I let her fasten a diaper or make baby food I am allowing her to be the big sister she wants to be. She is proud and happy that she can do these things.

She is not always so happy with the baby that everyone makes such a fuss over. She is not pleased that the baby who at least stayed put, unless someone else moved her, can now crawl over to knock her block tower over, or tear a book, or suck the hand of a beloved doll until it is soggy and shaped weird.

Sometimes she says not very nice things, even if they are funny. When she heard Vi cooing after her nap Pen ran in ahead of me and yelled "Violet just said her first word, and it was I'm not too cute!". And Pig says the meanest things about the baby at our house. Pig doesn't think she's cute at all, she thinks she should live at another house, and she steals and hides all of Violet's binkies. But then there are such sweet moments, like when  both girls wake from a nap together and I hear them in there talking to each other and laughing. Or when Pen plays peek a boo or does finger play or sings songs to Vi and completely thrills her baby sister. And at night, when the lights are out and we've said all our good nights Pen's last words are always a whispered "I love you the best Violet".

They are sisters. They will disagree, fight with each other even, I'm sure. They will learn from each other, hopefully be friends with each other, and take care of each other. I really want to nurture the take care of each other part of their relationship, as well as help Pen to be useful in the ways she desires to be, so when she says "can I help? can I do it?" I nearly always say of course you can.

I love how serious and happy with her job she is in the pictures of her bathing Vi. And how proud she is that I'm taking her picture as she grinds up baby food. I love that she even cares about these things. She is a good big sister to little Violet.